FILM ROMANCE: Unique Sensuality in Call Me by Your Name

 

    Happy Pride! Woohoo! Isn't it great? Although I'm not a member of the LGBTQ community myself, I have a ton of friends who are; being able to see them celebrate and embrace who they are to the utmost degree everyday (but especially during June) is so inspiring and heartwarming. While I believe our society still has a long way to go when it comes to accepting those in the LGBTQ community in everyday life, seeing those parade in the streets and show off their style and love for others on social media really gives me hope for the future.

    But ya know what doesn't make me happy? Seeing LGBTQ representation sloppily done in Hollywood. 

    Before the crowds come for me: NO. I don't think Call Me by Your Name is bad film representation of the LGBTQ community. I actually think it's quite a great one. However, this opinion is from someone who is a cis, white woman... so in actuality, it's not my place to fully make this claim. So instead of focusing on that topic, let's talk about something I can speak about: how the film industry represents chemistry, sensuality, and emotional commitment in a romantic relationship.

    Now I think Call Me by Your Name has a lot to offer when it comes to this specific umbrella. Not only does this film execute all three categories effortlessly, but it also has lots of layers intertwined from the plot that make this relationship seem so natural to the audience.

    Let's take the first one: chemistry. Elio and Oliver's chemistry is flawless. Not only do Chalamet and Hammer bring about such precision in so many physical details (the touching in public, the swimming, the eye contact, etc.) but the way they time their "bravery" in speaking more openly about their feelings is never aligned, even when they have their first kiss. One of them always tries to speak more frankly and openly about their feelings (usually Elio), and the ideas and hints are usually shut down or ignored (usually by Oliver). This brings in a "push and pull" in the relationship that seems very organic to something you would observe in real life.

    I think dragging on this kind of chemistry as long as this movie does can be really risky. It's easy to lose audience interest when passionate love isn't always being visually portrayed. But I do think that because the film gives so many opportunities where something intimate can happen (and frankly almost does), it teases the audience and keeps them intrigued waiting for them to finally just kiss.

    This is a really small, wonderful detail I think a lot of modern romance movies could benefit from. The "push and pull" effect (as I like to call it) is one thing any person watching, regardless the shape of their love life, can emotionally relate to. Like let's face it, I've never been brave enough to say my feelings outright to a crush like a lot of people in movies do. We all do the subtle hints (the hand on the thigh that falls slowly down onto the seat so it's free for a date to hold is a personal favorite) that get a chest feeling light, our stomach in butterflies, and our mind racing. It's the perfect way to set a solid foundation of romantic interest between two characters while giving time to the audience to become invest in these two characters and their new relationship. Spectacular. 

    Let's jump to the second topic: sensuality. I personally think this one is harder to achieve than the previous topic. Sensuality in itself usually rides the fine line between flirting and mindless sex. To achieve it in a classy way is difficult and usually requires the right set up, the right tone during said sensual experience, and the right decline.

    I'd really like to look at the scene where Elio and Oliver are in a big field and have their first kiss. Firstly, the setup feels so natural, that this scene slides right in, as if it were meant to be (no "forced to be in the same bed at a hotel" or "stuck in a bathroom at a party together" kind of tropes you find in a lot of bad romance movies). They are just hanging out, secluded, enjoying the nature of a place they both. And Elio's dialogue is so direct, yet so generic: "I love... this. I love everything". While out of context, this seems pretty pointless in terms of dialogue, but both characters and the audience have developed a "read between the lines" skill up to this point in the movie, and everyone involved knows loving "everything" means also loving Oliver. Instead of Elio initiating a sense of touch, Oliver is the one who touches Elio first. This small change of lead is what gives the Elio the courage to make a big move physically, and the audience knows it can only go uphill from here.

    Now for the actually kissing itself: it' messy and raw; it's shot all in one take. There is no other background noise but that of nature (I know a lot of movies like to put music and fast cut shots to make it seem more intense). But this kissing is slow, emotional, a release of tension and want from both the characters and the audience. It's real and unfiltered, and I think that's why it evokes such a strong hold on you as an audience member. And, just like any perfect moment (for Elio at least), it is cut way too short. That is the beauty of the decline; it leaves the audience hanging on for more. It not only puts you so deep in Elio's shoes, but the sudden crash keeps you hooked to see if it will ever happen again and what kind of effect it will have for both characters.

    Finally, let's analyze the emotional commitment of the relationship. Unlike a lot of other romantic movies, Call Me by Your Name does a lot of showing rather than doing, especially in the smaller scale stuff. For example, Oliver is seen as a pretty cross, pretentious, know it all person. But as him and Elio travel and experience things together, you see his smile loosen up, and his laugh comes out more often. He's not as hesitant to be vulnerable. And just like that, without saying any words, we know Oliver is truly having a good time. 

    Because this story is told from Elio's POV, it's a bit easier to see his emotional commitment. We see him do all the embarrassing stuff we all do when we have crushes (fantasize, obsess, overthink messages or incidences). And it's easy to see how enthralled Elio is with Oliver when we often see how uninterested or checked out Elio is with Marzia. Unlike other romance movies, not only do we see the romance from the first seed to the full blossom of Elio and Oliver's relationship, but we also see the downfall and crumble. And this isn't just for the end of the movie, but anytime Elio and Oliver get in fights or disagreements. However, being able to see this kind of unfiltered emotion (especially at the end of the film) speaks volumes more on emotional commitment than anything else in the film concerning their relationship. Seeing just how serious Elio took his time with Oliver and how deeply he committed himself is truly powerful (and it's something rarely see in romance films... it usually ends with the happily ever after ie the full blossom).

And there ya go! That's why Call Me by Your Name so affectively chews your heart up and spits it out. It's an unfiltered version of love that doesn't come to the big screen that often. And the fact that it has diverse representation that isn't offensive or stereotypical (in my eyes at least) makes it even better!

Alas, I do hope one day to be Somewhere in Northern Italy...